Sacrifice
by lookingforthestars
Summary: In another timeline, they lost each other. But not in this one.


**I wish we were getting more of the show, but at least we had a satisfying (if very intense) finale. I just had an idea for a short fic that takes place after future Chase rescues Gert, but before the breakfast scene.**

He was alive.

Gert was sure it was a hallucination, at first, until she realized that everyone looked just as confused as she did. Her next thought was one of Morgan's tricks, that the Runaways hadn't beaten her after all, and now she was going to torment them.

But then Chase's body vanished right in front of her and it had just been such a _surreal_ day in a pretty endless stream of them.

The Chase who still very much existed had been saying something to her, putting a hand on her shoulder, which was shaking because _her entire body was shaking_, but it was all fifty steps past overwhelming and she ran upstairs, followed closely by Old Lace. She locked the bedroom door behind them, taking frighteningly shallow breaths that made her think she might die tonight after all and scrambling almost blindly to find her medication.

It took a few tries with her borderline useless shaking hands, but she wrenched the bottle open and swallowed her pills, well aware that anxiety meds were not designed to accommodate _sorceress apocalypse_ and _dead boyfriend from the future _levels of stress.

No one came after her. Not right away. She said a silent _thank you_ to them. Talking through everything with her friends might make her feel less insane, somehow, but she needed time to wrap her head around the fact that Chase had invented _literal time travel_ to save her, and then died in her place, and she wished it was a hallucination, but it wasn't.

It wasn't her Chase. But it was Chase. And losing any version of him was going to haunt her.

* * *

"Hey."

"Gert, thank god," Chase said with an exhale when he saw her. "I tried to follow you, but Molly told me it would only freak you out worse."

"Probably. Can I come in?"

He gave her a look that clearly stated how stupid he thought the question was and moved to the side to give her space on his hammock. She closed the door, not sure she was ready to face the entire team just yet, and sat down, grateful that Chase was waiting silently while she gathered her thoughts.

"You're okay, right?" she asked, her voice uneven.

Chase tilted his head. "I'm fine, Gert. You know that wasn't me."

"I-I know. But it's not like we understand the implications of time travel and I just want to make sure you're not feeling weird, or anything."

"I feel very weird. I saw my own body." He shrugged. "But physically, I'm okay. My future self successfully changed the past, so I don't think this is a time loop situation. I'll probably have a very different life than he did."

Gert clutched the edge of the bed with both hands, feeling a little dizzy and realizing that she was holding her breath. "Chase, I know why you were here. The other you, I mean. I…"

"I know," he cut her off, like he knew that saying it out loud was abjectly terrifying. "Tina heard. She told us."

"We've been pretty close to death a few times. But just knowing that…that there are other timelines in which both of us died…I don't even know how to f-feel about that. No one has, like, a self-help podcast for that."

Chase didn't say anything for a minute, and then nodded. "I know it's not the same as…a-as seeing it…but hearing that you died in some alternate timeline has been hard to stomach. I can't really imagine coming that close to losing you. It, uh…it makes me sick."

Gert wet her dry lips with her tongue, controlling her breathing almost obsessively because she kind of felt like screaming. "You died in my arms, Chase. Before the real you…the p-present you…came down the stairs, I felt like my heart had been ripped out of my chest. I wished it was me, instead, and then it turns out it actually was and…wow, this is all so messed up."

"You're not wrong." Chase put his hand down next to hers, close enough that she was acutely aware of it even though they weren't touching. "But you're okay. And honestly, I care about that more anything else. More than beating Morgan. More than anything that happened in an alternate timeline or in the future or…anywhere that isn't right here and right now."

They looked at each other. His eyes showed the truth of what he was saying, but she already knew he wasn't lying. Not after what he did.

"You traveled through time to save me, Chase. That's…completely insane," she whispered.

His face turned rueful, his lips pressing into a thin line. "I didn't. _He_ did."

"I'm sorry," Gert said in a mocking tone, trying to lighten the mood because he suddenly looked too sad and she couldn't quite handle it, "Are you jealous of your future self?"

Chase's expression softened, and she felt like she was under a spell that made her incapable of looking at anything except him. As many times as she teased him for being a dumb jock, she'd always known he was more than that. She could see it, even when she wished she couldn't because it was easy to be _attracted to_ but not _in love with_ someone gorgeous but shallow.

"No," he answered softly. "I'm not jealous of anyone who had to live without you."

For a second, it felt like the air had been sucked completely out of her lungs. And then it rushed back in full force, a cavalcade of words coming with it. "All that stuff I said about finding other people who were better for us…I was just bracing myself in case you left again. B-But you never left. Even after I was gone. You never gave up on me and I'm sorry that I haven't been fair to you since you got back. I really wanted to believe it when you said you loved me, but I just thought it was better to-."

"Gert. _Gert_," he said to stop her rambling. She swallowed, the rest of her words dying out. "You had every right not to trust me. But I…I may not be him, yet, but I would have done the same thing if I lost you." Chase lifted his hand to her cheek, stroking tentatively with his thumb. It felt simultaneously like it might break her apart and like it was the only thing holding her together. "I accepted it when you told me to find someone else, but I knew I didn't want to. I'm all the way in this, Gert. Especially now that I know how miserable I clearly was without you. How much I gave up to get you back."

Gert offered him a weak smile, wrapping his hand with hers and bringing it down to her lap. "How about we just thank the versions of ourselves that made those sacrifices and be thankful that we don't have to. Not today, anyway."

He squeezed her hand. "I love you, Gert. I know you weren't super thrilled to hear that the other day but if I thought I was dying to say it before, that's nothing compared to how bad I need to say it now."

"Not great word choice."

"Sorry. Y-You know what I meant."

"Yeah. I know." Gert chewed on her lip, stopping just before she tasted blood. "I do, too. As in, like, I feel the same. I'm sorry, it's just really hard for me to get the words out right now because this has been a hell of a day, but…"

"It's okay." The way his face lit up made her sure that it was enough for him, at least for tonight. "Thank you."

"So, um…" She looked down, forcing the words out because the last time she suggested this, it didn't go well. "I'm pretty sure I'm going to have nightmares about you dying. And it would help if I could wake up, and…and see you right away."

Chase raised his eyebrow, looking surprised but not at all displeased. "You want me to stay with you tonight?"

"Please?" she asked, her voice a lot smaller than she meant it to be. But there was a large part of her that no longer feared losing the upper hand around Chase, because he had literally given up his life for her and it felt really stupid not to trust him after that.

"Of course I will," he murmured. Gert leaned into him, her head against his chest as his arms pulled her tight. She could hear his heartbeat. A little fast, like hers. But strong and steady.

He was alive.


End file.
